Life as I see

The river Ganges abutted one end of the city I was born.When I was young I was quite a religious kid.My granny used to take me to the banks of the holy river where after some ablutions we used to worship in a baroque stone temple on a high cliff.I used to watch the tiny waves meeting the bank and the sporadic bursts of water rushing towards the banks due to a motorboat steering through the rivers heart.
When I was a child I was always afraid of he river,fearing of the deluge it brought.During the rainy season I could never visit the temple since the beaten path, which was closest route to it,would have flooded.Once I asked my granny that what made people to take blessings of the river,what made a holy dip.She said "The river is so very powerful but it has never lead to a disaster.We should seek benedictions of the holy river". I believed in every word of her with not a scintilla of sacrilege.
Now that I have grown up,in my early twenties and my granny flown to heaven, things were never same when I stood by the riveredge.My mind felt more like I can steer the same old boat through the river.I felt like swimming through the heart of the river and rely on the power and passion that my youth has provided me.What used to be a river for me in the childhood now seemed more like a challenge for my strong shoulders.After all everything was controllable and predictable.Or whether I had made a mistake at interpreting things.
Sometimes the forces and agents of the nature fill me with a strong sense of remorse.I reflect the egoist nature,the only unholy thing I have received from the society.Some bitter understanding of the enthronging mass , and lack of an empathysising soul can really bring psychic turnarounds in personality.Or may be I am still too young to understand what lies beneath my material self.But anyways I am waiting for the time when my hairs grow grey and the power of lust subsides inside me.May the fear of the nature visit me then again and eternity rule my soul,elevate me of my sacrilege.

thought of the day:A child becomes an adult when he realizes that he has a right not only to be right but also to be wrong-"Thomas Szasz"